


You're the Dumbbell to My Gym-I'm Sorry What?

by myLITTLEnekoSHIRO



Category: Bleach
Genre: F/M, M/M, Romantic Comedy, grimmjowbeingsexyashell, ichigobeingobliviousashell, nnoitrabeingapervertashell, rukiabeingrukiaashell
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-03-03
Updated: 2013-03-03
Packaged: 2017-12-04 03:58:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,003
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/706283
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/myLITTLEnekoSHIRO/pseuds/myLITTLEnekoSHIRO
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"I'm not desperate." "To shag her?" "TO DATE HER!" "Then what the hell is up with all the mushy texting and goofy grinning!?"</p>
            </blockquote>





	You're the Dumbbell to My Gym-I'm Sorry What?

**Author's Note:**

> Got the idea while gymming today. Yeahhhh….
> 
> Title was completely random. Please do not note it's completely ridiculous senselessness.
> 
> Made while listening to "I Knew You Were Trouble" by Taylor Swift. I feel dirty…
> 
> Italic sentence are thoughts.
> 
> Slight IchiRuki. Mostly GrimmIchi and Nnoitra just being a pervert.
> 
> Yayyy oneshots!*throws confetti*
> 
> P.S. I don't know why but I think my writing style sucks now. And I started feeling this after I read 50 Shades of Grey…

'Ow! What the hell, Grimm?' Ichigo yelped as his best, blue-headed idiot of a friend almost took his head off with a pair of dumbbells. He glared at the smirking bastard.

'Not my fault you were too busy grinning stupidly at your cellphone,' Grimmjow pointed out slyly. That comment had the orangehead turning bright red and the bluenette grinning even wider.

'Oho, what's got _you_ so red, huh, berry?' he teased, leaning forward to take a peek at Ichigo's phone screen. The bright-haired boy quickly hid it from view.

'None of your fucking business,' he muttered, scooting into a corner to attempt texting in peace. Grimmjow raised an eyebrow.

'Oh yeah, sure,' Grimmjow drawled, casually looking the other way. 'I respect that. ICHIGO, CATCH!'

'Huh- _oof!_ '

A dumbbell came flying out of nowhere right at him. In a panic, Ichigo threw his phone away to grab the heavy instrument with both hands, which almost knocked him off his feet. Grimmjow didn't exactly do bicep curls with toothpicks.

'What the _hell_ , Grimmjow?!' Ichigo shouted this time, rounding on the bluenette. His angry expression suddenly twisted into one of horror when he saw his precious cellphone in the hands of the devil himself. 'Give it back _now_.'

'Not until I find out what you were grinning about!' Ichigo was now chasing a laughing Grimmjow all over the gym with everyone staring at them like they were a couple of maniacs.

'You are _dead_ ,' Ichigo growled from across the treadmill wedged between them. Grimmjow frowned at the screen.

'Dude, all you've got are messages from Rukia,' he muttered as he easily evaded a desperate grab from the orangehead. Then his eyes widened. He glanced from the phone to a fuming Ichigo and then back to the phone. 'Wait, are you guys-?'

'No! How desperate do you think I am?!' Ichigo practically shouted which stunned the bluenette. Catching him off guard, Ichigo quickly snatched his phone from Grimmjow's grasp and stomped back angrily to his workout bench. Grimmjow followed him, studying his best friend's behavior closely.

'But you _did_ shag her, right? I mean, why else would she be clinging to you and practically begging you to go steady with her?' he pointed out. Ichigo sighed in aggravation and ran his hands through his hair.

'Like I _said_ , Grimmjow,' he stressed while keeping his rage in check. 'I'm _not_ desperate.'

'To date her?'

'To shag her!'

'Then what the hell is up with all the mushy texting and goofy grinning?'

'It's _nothing_!'

Grimmjow snorted and got down on his haunches so that he was right in front of Ichigo.

'Oi,' he exclaimed. 'I ain't your best friend for show. I _know_ something happened that's got you feeling weird. So spill. Before I steal your phone again and sext Rukia.'

Ichigo's jaw dropped before he regained his composure to scowl at the smug bluenette.

'You've gotta be descended from Satan. I just know it,' he muttered. Then he exhaled slowly, closing his eyes and turning his head to the ceiling. 'Rukia kissed me.'

Grimmjow blinked in surprise.

'And?' he pressed.

'Well, I responded.'

'And?'

'Then she told me she liked me.'

' _And?_ '

'And she had for a long time.'

'Jesus fucking Christ, Ichigo, what the hell did _you_ do?'

'I didn't do anything,' the orangehead mumbled bashfully, pulling his head down to eye level. 'I mean, yeah, we've been sorta dating but I was never thinking about anything _serious_. So when she brought it up, I wasn't sure _what_ I wanted. Don't get me wrong, she's a _great_ girl. But I keep getting this nagging feeling that I might not be happy with _her_.'

'So what's with all the texting then?'

'Well, I told her I'd think about it. This was about a week ago…'

'And you tell me this _now_?'

'Because she _just_ brought it up! She was all "I can't stop thinking about me" and that she wanted to kiss me all over again! She was getting damn mushy and I was feeling bad about not giving her an answer for so long!'

'Awww! Ichigo is going soft!'

'I am not-don't you _dare_ pull my cheek, you bastard! Fuck it, you don't get it!' Ichigo pushed Grimmjow aside and began to walk away.

'Hey, hey, hey, I was just kidding, Ichigo!' the bluenette laughed half-heartedly and tugged on Ichigo's workout shirt sleeve which managed to get the guy to stop. 'I'll be serious about this. Promise.'

Ichigo licked his lower lip in hesitation. It wasn't that he was unsure about telling Grimmjow about his feelings. But he couldn't deny that it was slightly weird to do so. Grimmjow was…special. But not in a "best friend" way. It was hard to explain. Or at least, that's what Ichigo told himself.

He turned to face Grimmjow, noting the seriousness in those blue irises. His own hardened.

'I like Rukia,' he muttered. 'I really do. But I feel like if I say yes, then I'd be missing out on something _good_ I've always failed to notice…'

 _I need an answer, Grimmjow_ , Ichigo chanted in his head. _Give me the goddamn_ right _answer so I don't do something_ stupid.

For a minute, Grimmjow didn't say anything. All he did was stare at Ichigo's feet for what seemed like an eternity. Ichigo was practically ready to scream at him to say something when Grimmjow finally looked up. Ichigo inhaled sharply. Those blue eyes looked so _empty._

'But you do like her?' the bluenette asked quietly. 'Right?'

 _No, no, no, that's_ not _what you're supposed to say!_

Ichigo balled his hands into fists.

'Yeah…' he forced himself to answer. Grimmjow inhaled deeply before smiling ruefully.

'Then just tell her how you feel,' he said simply.

 _You_ idiot! _This was your goddamn chance, you ignorant fuck!_

'That's not as easy as it sounds,' Ichigo muttered, eyes downcast, heart flipping.

'It actually is.'

A moment of silence lapsed between them.

'Did you ever confess to someone, Grimm?' Ichigo asked suddenly. He looked up, hoping to gage _some_ kind of reaction from the bluenette. Grimmjow just tilted his head to one side, deep in thought. Then he smiled strangely.

'Never got the chance,' he replied. 'They were already taken. And besides, I don't think they would want me anyway.'

 _You're wrong, you're wrong, you are so fucking wrong. Can't you see? Just ask._ Please. _I beg you._

'So I'm done with my workout,' Grimmjow said, hasty to change the subject. 'I'll go grab my bag from the locker room and then we'll head out, hm? I'm in the mood for some pizza tonight!'

'Yeah, sure,' Ichigo replied hollowly, turning around to rest his hands on the weight rack as he heard Grimmjow walk away. His heart was practically ready to leap out of his chest.

So close, he had been _so close_ to the _right_ answer. Shit, why was this so difficult? If Grimmjow couldn't say it then shouldn't he be the one to-

A hand suddenly smacked his ass. He jumped in shock, whirling around to come face to face with a beanpole of a human being. And a pedophilic profile of a face to match. Ichigo scowled at him.

'Got a problem, buddy?' he growled, hands curling into fists. The beanpole grinned so widely his mouth practically took up his entire lower face.

'Sexy and fiery. I like that,' he cackled. The sound made Ichigo's stomach turn.

'Fuck off,' he muttered, edging away to finish off his routine. He'd rather not start a pointless fight. As soon as his hands wrapped around the steel bar of a barbell, a pair of large hands suddenly clasped around his own. He whipped his head around, scowl on and ready for the kill.

'What part of "fuck off" did you not get, you nympho?' Ichigo hissed, quickly ducking away from that looming figure. The pervert laughed.

'The "off" part,' he remarked, his one eye glittering under his bandana. 'Aw, come on, buddy, never been hit on before or what?'

'Not by sickos no,' Ichigo replied viciously. God, what he would _give_ to knock this fucker's teeth in. But causing a scene might make him lose his gym membership. And he was _not_ in the mood for that.

'Well, first time for everything, huh?'

 _I don't have_ time _for this_ , Ichigo thought angrily, stepping to one side to walk away. Except the beanpole moved to block him. Ichigo looked up, mouth opened in a snarl.

'Leave me the _fuck_ alone.'

'Sure thing,' the obscenely tall guy drawled. Then he leaned down, smile broadening. 'After I get a little _kiss_.'

Ichigo was ready to throw up all over the guy's face.

'In your dreams,' he grumbled, moving to the other side. Except the guy moved in synchrony. Ichigo cursed under his breath. Would this guy just _give up_ already?

'Awww, baby, now why you gotta be like that?' the no good, son of a bitch purred. Ichigo ground his teeth in frustration. Pulling at his last straw here…

'Okay, listen up close before I do some _serious_ damage to your vital organs,' Ichigo spat, body shaking with anger. 'I'm gonna ask you _real_ nicely to _leave me alone_ and you're going to be _real_ nice and _leave me the fuck alone_. We clear?'

The beanpole smirked, crossing his arms.

'Not a-' he began but got cut off when he was roughly shoved to one side and almost into a rack of dumbbells. Ichigo blinked.

'Oi,' Grimmjow uttered to the bewildered beanpole. 'You deaf or something? He just said to leave him alone.'

The pervert recovered quite quickly from his shock.

'What? You his bodyguard or something?' he sneered, looking down on the stoic bluenette. Even though he was taller than Grimmjow, Grimmjow exuded a such menacing aura that it made up for his lack of height. The blue-haired man crossed his arms casually.

'I'm his best friend,' he answered dryly. 'So I look out for him.'

'So what? Doesn't mean you have to protect his virginity,' he snorted. 'S'not like you're his _boyfriend_ …'

Ichigo winced. That guy was right. Grimmjow wasn't. So why…

'Actually, I am,' Grimmjow replied suddenly. Ichigo's jaw dropped.

_I'm sorry, what?_

The dark-haired bastard barked a short laugh.

'Bull,' he cackled.

Grimmjow raised an eyebrow at him. Then shrugged. Before turning around, grabbing Ichigo by the shoulders and pulling him forward into a searing kiss.

Ichigo's eyes widened. He felt his body melting under the hot touch of Grimmjow's lips against his own and the fire lighting his own body. Grimmjow was kissing him. Grimmjow was _kissing_ him. Grimmjow was kissing _him_. God, oh God, oh, dear, _dear_ God, he must be in heaven.

His eyes fluttered as a moist tongue slipped between his parted lips and dangled playfully with his own. He pushed back slightly, his body relaxing into the bluenette's strong hold. He could feel a heated palm on the nape of his neck and didn't know whether to push back into it or forward against Grimmjow's _(fucking delicious)_ mouth. _God_ , this was better than he could ever imagine. Just when he was getting into it, Grimmjow quickly pulled away, turning his lidded eyes on the gaping beanpole.

'Still think I'm bullshitting?' he remarked, a hint of mirth in his tone.

The bastard's mouth snapped shut into a thin line before he turned on his heel and stomped off, muttering curses under his breath. Once he was out of sight, Grimmjow turned to a dazed Ichigo, wiping the side of his mouth with a thumb while grinning broadly.

'Well, least I don't have to say _my_ confession,' he said blatantly before walking off.

Ichigo stared after him. Then, after a minute, he quickly pulled out his phone, typed in a message, sent it and then went sprinting after Grimmjow.

_Hey Rukia, I like you too. But not in that way. I'm sorry but I can't bring myself to like you like that._

_'Cause you see, I've already fallen for somebody else…_


End file.
